Of my random ramblings

advice

2012-02-14T06:07:00.000-08:00

"you practically had no end to your year" & that was why...

sayyyyy cheese!

2012-02-14T02:26:00.000-08:00

bumped into my sister's JC friend at the NUS canteen

and he said, "hey! I just wassap your sister leh!"

me: "what you are doing here? I thought you working in HDB?"

him: "I'm working here! your sis never tell you?"

me: "nope"

him: "let's take a photo! and wassap her!"

sis: hahahahahaha!

muker tak bleh blah

2012-02-13T09:18:00.000-08:00

during 1/2 time break my friend said, "let's take a photo! with your macbook"

and so it began.

luckily only one soul behind us. (who covered her face with her lappie) lol!

Art as Historical Sources

2012-02-13T07:51:00.000-08:00

Asian Art as Historical Sources (Missionaries, Nationalism, Colonialism etc)

East West Artistic Interactions Mod

One of the most enjoyable history mod I read last two sems! - Ages of the Mediterranean

Happened to see these in my lappie while i was looking for my docs. :)

thank you

2012-02-13T05:47:00.000-08:00

i am always thankful and I know that you would only want what's best for me.

but time and again, I have to retract myself from your expectations of me

and live it my way.

cos I can't always be the person who you want me to be.

Latest Design! squeals!

2012-02-13T04:44:00.000-08:00

Sooooo pretty!

For the whole of my life I only wore and have swatch watches (except for my kiddy watches which does not count of course)

I have 3 swatch watches currently. Love the designs!

When sis got back from Switzerland a year ago, she asked, "guess what I got for you?". It was a swatch watch from the original land of the swatch! Switzerland :)

& My mom once said to me, "Tak habis habis swatch. Tukar lah brand lain" :P

Friendship day is the halal version of valentine's day LOL

2012-02-13T02:47:00.000-08:00

Can't help to think that one thing lead to another.

Maybe god decided to answer my prayers this way.

I'm just hoping that whatever decision I make will be what's best for me, insyaAllah.

On another note, swatch finally has a new collection of watches!!! Finally!!!

So which of the favors of your Lord would you deny?

2012-02-12T16:33:00.000-08:00

Walked pass the arts walkway and saw a part of surah ar-rahman. And I remembered how once I heard a beautiful recitation of the surah before.

I think the guy in the video below is the voice in my iphone quran app.

beautiful recitation, masyaAllah.

http://quran.com/55: the whole surah with english translation.

Good morneeeeng

2012-02-12T16:08:00.000-08:00

Woke up with my heart feeling at ease but my head throbbing like hell.

I thought I had a peaceful sleep. Wonder what I was thinking about

the year that started with a bang

2012-02-10T21:19:00.000-08:00

this year started with a bang for me (never before) and i'm just glad that I'm done with January because it was one hell of a roller coaster ride.

and pretty much what I faced in the 1st month of the year affected me (and still is affecting me, trying to shrug it off asap).

but you know, taking it in a positive light, i came to realize of some of the lessons that I've learnt and some of the lessons are recurring like:

how i should not try to control things that are beyond my control. or even worry about them. cos only god knows.

of turning 21.

2012-02-10T16:12:00.000-08:00

my birthday always coincides with the 13th week of school which also marks the end of every school year.

its a good thing cos i complete a year and grow a year older. and a bad thing... cos

it also means I won't have the time to celebrate it cos 13th week of school means the deadlines of essays, presentations and debates.

in two months time it's week 13!

yaumul jum'ah

2012-02-10T07:22:00.000-08:00

trip from tampines to yishun takes only 30 minutes by car. thank god. can't imagine taking the mrt.

alhamdullilah, arrihlah min changi ila baiti ngairu dhawil lianna rakabtu assaiyaraha abi. arrihlah thalathun daqiqah faqad. al an ana fauqa sarir. uridu an inama alan.

AJ

2012-02-10T00:43:00.000-08:00

Exited the house at the same time as my neighbor and she was donning the AJ uniform.

My thoughts:

1) I'm so old! 4 years older yikes

2) bitter sweet memories. All the best to her! But she's really smart so I guess she'll ease her way through especially with H2 math that I struggled with haha :P

of sembawang beach

2012-02-09T06:02:00.001-08:00

during my secondary school days, me and my friends visit the sembawang beach rather frequently. we have CCA stuff there pretty often.

i remembered one day nearing to the O level exams, the 4 of us went to the beach, hugged each other's shoulders while facing the beach and screamed our lungs out.

haha. thinking about it now... why were we so stressed back then?

oh memories.

freshie

2012-02-09T04:30:00.000-08:00

i absent mindedly left my house telekung in school. so i sneaked into mom's room to cop her's but tadaaaa i saw a whole pile of newly washed telekungs! :)

#tuponnakbilangker

anyway, i've made up my mind about something and I will stick to it! insyaAllah with god's willing.

i miss my sisters

2012-02-08T07:24:00.001-08:00

i miss my sisters. we are all so preoccupied with our own ambitions that it has been a long time since we sincerely spent time with each other.

one is so far in the west. and the other is so far... away in another continent altogether. (but sis is moving to yishun (two blocks away when she permanently resides in singapore. yay! so does that make me the default baby sitter? :P)

just wanna say that i miss both of you dearly!

hats off to you, you and you.

2012-02-08T02:10:00.001-08:00

i have always had the awe for people with good qualities that I do not find in myself. or passion for things that do not (or have yet to) interest me.

i wonder how....

and my mom said, "tak habis habis nak tabik orang" (u're forever at awe/have the feeling of respect for people)

ana saadzhabu majnun! (literally translated from english: i'm going crazy!

2012-02-08T00:51:00.000-08:00

translating 14 pages of this becomes less of a pain (still a pain regardless) when the author (whom I suspect is my lecturer) has a sense of humour.

i find myself breaking out in laughter at certain parts of the story. haha. more like i'm amused.

nice quote

2012-02-07T22:35:00.000-08:00

"you're not just given another day to live, but a chance to right the wrong of yesterday"

comfort

2012-02-07T18:25:00.000-08:00

its so comfortable to study at home on the bed bolstered by 4 pillows -

bijanibi yamin, bijanibi syimal, fauqa annafsi wa khalf annafsi.

haha. nak belajar ker nak tido? :PP

cos you're cold then you're hot.

2012-02-07T16:09:00.000-08:00

this year marks my 7th year of studying the Cold War.

Ok la, Sec 3 & sec 4, JC1 & JC2 and now.

and honestly, it's not very easy to study the cold war cos there's so many factors interplaying at one time.

and you don't know when to draw the line between what's cold and what's hot.

this shall be my final kopek at this and hopefully it will be the best one.

money and time

2012-02-07T14:52:00.000-08:00

money cannot buy time.

as much as money is important for us to spend our time well,

i think i prefer having time to myself more than working for money right now.

i'm saying this from the perspective of teaching tuition.

which I did for the past 2 years and I have decided to lay off from doing for this year despite offers.

well, having money is always good. but, having more time feels good too.

geekkkeeey

2012-02-07T05:58:00.000-08:00

i think this page on facebook is funny: http://www.facebook.com/f.facts?sk=wall (F up facts)

hahaha!

can't rotate.

what I am reading right now. just felt like posting it up for no reason.

cheecher

2012-02-06T20:39:00.001-08:00

i would seriously consider becoming a primary school teacher if there were only 20 max students per class.

i love kids but yes, they are a bunch to handleeeeeeeeeee.

over the monday blues

2012-02-06T05:56:00.000-08:00

my day which started at 10 and did not end till 7 ended at last! (lecture, tutorial, project meeting, lecture, mid terms)

and it ended with a mid terms. (and its not even the mid of the term! huhu)

and i'm glad that my tutor out of the three profs is the nicest one! i was happy that i grabbed my friends arm and whispered "yay!"

hehe. she makes the module so much palatable. alhamdullilah.

alhamdullilah for today.

arabian knights

2012-02-05T06:36:00.000-08:00

sometimes my mom just blabbers to me in arabic at the wrong time when my mind is blank.

and it takes a while to process what she says.

yes, my mom is an arab + bugis and my granpapa was a sailor from yemen. but i'm fully malay. haha

famous people

2012-02-05T05:44:00.000-08:00

i just googled for fun and found out that steve carell was a history major.

and i wonder how he gets so whacked in the head (at least on TV)

and chris martin from cold play.

and tonnes of US presidents :O

Theodore Roosevelt (Harvard University)
Woodrow Wilson (Princeton University)
Franklin D. Roosevelt (Harvard University)
Richard Nixon (Whittier College)
George W. Bush (Yale University)

because I am not you

2012-02-05T02:13:00.000-08:00

sometimes people disagree with your decisions because they have an expectation(s) of you.

but as a beholder of your life, sometimes you just can't follow what others expect of you.

you've got to live your own life, the way you want to.

cos after all, you know yourself best

second half of the league

2012-02-04T05:01:00.001-08:00

every single semester, i'll see a few undergraduates post this on facebook.

surely with difficulty is ease,

with difficulty is surely ease.

surah al-insyirah.

and i find myself reciting the surah too during the semester.

insyaallah, amin.

believe in qada' and qadar and put in your best, then leave the rest to allah.

just wanna curl up in bed underneath the blanket right now.

2012-02-03T04:25:00.000-08:00

this week ended with a bang in the head. and i felt incredibly snappy at the end of it all.

emotional creatures are not rational.

it's my fault and there's no excuse for such.

i'm incredibly sorry.

2012-02-02T04:32:00.000-08:00

alan, ana fi alngurfatiyi alaumi alwahadahu.

indi alwajibu kathirun al yaum.

kitabi katiri wa alkubbu qahwahun fauqa attawilahi al an.

utuwaqifu an atakalam al an wa afalu alwajibi.

affuan, indi litarabu lungatal arabiyi adiman.

HAHAHA. ok switch code back to maksaleh mode. needa do history readings now.

2012-02-02T02:14:00.000-08:00

Saaklamu lughatul Arabiah Alan wa kullu yaum liannaha sakban kathiran. Ana takbanan kathiran al yum lianna addarsu lughatal arabiah liarabi' assaah.

Indi imtihaan ba'da usbuk. Saiqra katirab kitab at tarikh ala yaumul sabt wa yaumul ahad.

Bit Taufiq!!

Ana saidahtun jiddan Alan lianna sairjik'u albait :)

Hahaha ok hantam bochai. Lol. Illaliqaq!!

wonder

2012-02-01T04:40:00.000-08:00

the moment you wonder how it all happened.

it's just beyond you.

but you continue to wonder.

exotik

2012-02-01T02:54:00.000-08:00

i was intrigued and excited at the same time (oh yes, i am a mega foodie) when I saw that mc donalds are currently selling the chocolate macaroon flavoured mc flurry.

the taste of chocolate macaroons is kindda subtle.

for the real deal, head down to bugis - cake love couture at jalan pisang. the macaroons are damnnn oooosum. :)

the nearest and really near macaroons fix i can get is at YIH, NUS delifrance but they are too sweet for my liking.

when random songs pop in da head

2012-01-31T15:54:00.000-08:00

john's legend's song is playing in the head right now.

john legend has a really nice voice, but he sings loads of pervertic songs. whyyy!!

it's weird. the songs in my head changes from my chemical romance to phantom of the opera to foo fighters and it goes on. (depending on the mood i guess)

when sis was still my roomie, random songs would pop in the head at shower and I will then sing them to her in a hard attempt to wake her always cranky-i-just-woke-up self in the mornings.

Syukran ya ummi

2012-01-31T03:25:00.000-08:00

Mom asked what coffee I like and when I got home there were packets of em :)

:) it's not wrong to express your gratitude even for the smallest thing that people do for you right.

Though I find it incredibly hard to stay awake these days even with coffee. So sleepy

home sweet home

2012-01-30T05:43:00.000-08:00

It feels so goooood to be home after a long day :)

a warm bath

a bowl of hot tomyam seafood soup

and a cup of hot tea.

home sweet home!

my 2 cents of macam paham (about bags)

2012-01-29T06:48:00.000-08:00

http://thepropertyof.com/about/
I love to look at the bags on this website. Although admittedly the bags have jarringly masculine look to them because it is a men's bag shop. love love the rustic feel of the designs nevertheless!

http://www.fossilsingapore.com.sg/
I love leather bags and i love to look at fossil bags. BUT. the leather used makes the bags heavy. but I really love just walking into the shops and soaking in the leather smell. they sell really really cute wallets, yes. really cute!

escapist thoughts

2012-01-29T04:07:00.000-08:00

only the 3rd week of school and i'm already thinking of the holidays (not really a bad thing actually, keeps me going for the rest of the semester)

trip to chicago to visit sis
trip to indonesia with JC pals

and to clean my wardrobe (LOL!) and donate all unused clothes.

ok back to readings. booooo.

perangai (malam-malam)

2012-01-28T08:24:00.001-08:00

craving for more salmon and tuna sashimis!

oh maaaannn. when I just had them 5 hours ago.

more than meets the eye.

2012-01-28T05:53:00.000-08:00

liking or judging a person at first sight has never made sense to me.

just by the physicality or appearance, says something, but it says nothing much, really.

beyond the superficial, character traits through contact and interaction reveals much more.

of useless observation

2012-01-28T05:21:00.000-08:00

my house car park has never been this full at 9pm! (yes, this is considered full) on normal days, at 11pm-12pm it's still barely occupied. only at 5am do i see the car park fully occupied. it's because of CNY i guess.

haha i know this is such a useless observation but, can't help it. i'll see the carpark as frequently as the times I look for food or go to the loo in the kitchen.

the blue light at the far end is koo teck puat hospital. very strategically placed, considering that there are many old folks in yishun.

Buffet dinner

2012-01-28T02:38:00.000-08:00

It's a waste of money when I have buffets. Cos I really can't stomach alot.

Got my doze of salmon and tuna sashimis and duck meat that are not widely available on the mainstream halal food places tho.

Fetih 1453 Movie The Ottoman Empire

2012-01-27T05:52:00.000-08:00

The Lord of the Rings Turkish style.

Movie trailer (yet to be released movie - "in cinemas no where near you" - prof lol!)

About the Ottoman Empire conquest of Byzantine's Empire state of Constantinople by Mehmet II in 1453. (History of present day Istanbul, Turkey)

Amazzzziiinnggg!!! I love what I'm learning right now. Only that, yes, it's content heavy.

suck it up!

2012-01-26T21:21:00.000-08:00

i'm getting a packet of sweets before this upcoming lecture.

reconciling two "differences"

2012-01-26T06:17:00.000-08:00

Sis wassap me this pic. yes, she is doing sociology while I am doing history. so, we talk about the differences between these two disciplines and our prejudices towards them (huhuhu) :P

I can't deny that history has its sociological bits to it. a blatant obvious one is a history mod offered this sem - "Historicizing Gender"

& Art history takes into account sociological theories too like how, paintings are not reflective of solely the artist's life, but the society he lives in as well etc.

& Recently, sis told me how her prof made them read about military history stuff and they were all surprised that history is not based on many theories.

"oh, sociologists!" :P

a good advert!

2012-01-26T05:30:00.001-08:00

bersifat benar

rajin berusaha

bertawkal kepada allah

paling berani

bersifat amanah

bersifat adil

feeling 1st day in school

2012-01-26T02:55:00.000-08:00

today was a good day in school! (after 5 and 1/2 days of break)

started out on a bench, then in a classroom (arabic lecture boom pow pow. so many information. understandable but have not yet been absorbed :P), then at baskin and robbins!

now i'm feeling very high and bloated from all the ice cream. the peanut butter chocolate one has huge ass chunks of peanut butter!! (do you know how many calories that is? hehehe oh who cares....!)

tomorrow 3 lectures and 1 tutorial! *sings i am survivor*

yes, i'm high on sugar right now.

du du du..

2012-01-25T18:25:00.000-08:00

the office is so funny

nepotism -mixing family and business:

"if there is nothing wrong with this Michael, then why have you been keeping it a secret?"

"because i wanted you to say, "wow he is so great" and i was going to say, "it's in the genes". and i was actually going to wear jeans."

hahaha!!

off to school!

tutorial trouble

2012-01-25T16:46:00.000-08:00

this sem i've got loads of trouble with tutorials cos i'm taking all 5 arts mods. (or maybe it's just not my luck)

but thank goodness for two friends who have kindly agreed to swap tutorial slots with me so that i wouldn't have to drop a module because the only slot that's available for balloting clashes with another module and for another module, i wouldn't have 8 hours of break in between.

thank you so so so so much guys! :) :) :)

sometimes the system gets too rigid, you feel like you are in a maze, move left, right, back, front or just remain stuck there.

why history?

2012-01-25T03:06:00.000-08:00

stories have beginnings, middles and ends and the storyline progresses from one end to the other, the past serving as the pre-history of the present.

stories have a need for continuity, with traceable consequences, causes and effects.

richard howells

the renaissance

2012-01-24T23:22:00.000-08:00

This is one of my favourite from the time of the Renaissance.

It looks so 3D on a flat surface and the two subjects in the middle are plato and aristotle.

nothing to do with the christian theology (or as far as i've understood the painting)

Raphael, The School of Athens, 1510-1511 AD, Italy

bob

2012-01-24T22:43:00.001-08:00

i love my bob hair. it's short so no matter how much i ruffle my hair it will still look in place.

good for when i'm studying

imagine hair pulling/hair messing action while:

doing never ending "biler nak habis ni!!" readings.

shopping withdrawal

2012-01-24T18:31:00.000-08:00

I have not gone shopping for a long time now. not that i have anything i need. more like things i want but don't need. so let's just continue to resist any evil temptations and save for a rainy day. ;)

I don't want to go to school!! 5 days of holidays (holy days) was sucha bliss. ^^ This Friday my timetable is crazy: 8-10, 10-12, 2-4 & 6-8. wooowwwwweeee!

chow!

syukran

2012-01-24T04:56:00.000-08:00

miahahahahaha.

alhamdullilah :)

and on another good note, I still have no school till 2pm on thursday! yay yay yay.

dad's birthday tomorrow and as usual, i have no idea what to get him. he has everything i can think of. i pad cover? i phone cover? laptop? he has it. new watch? he has it. and he's a very simple man when it comes to dressing up and he just bought lotsa nice shirts that mom picked. i can't stop telling mom it looks nice on him, even when it's on the laundry pole and i happen to catch sight of it... and my mom, of course....

takes credit for her good choices :P

"tengoklah siaper yang pilih" LOL!

prolly get him a cake and a a a? another shirt? or something. and treat him to macs for breakfast before he goes to work.

:) happy birthday daddddd!

i have always admired you for many of your good qualities, especially your patience. only that I have never told you that. i'll get emotional or something if i were to tell you that so.... you shall not find out :)

but from the bottom of my heart, thank you abah, for being such a responsible and supportive dad i could ever asked for. and it saddens me to know i can never repay you for everything you've done, but I will try to be a good daughter, insyaAllah and I will always remember you in my doas... :)

run & sleep

2012-01-24T04:17:00.000-08:00

you know how running regulates sleep.

i'm convinced that I should only go for my runs in the evenings and no more in the mornings.

running makes me wanna sleep again.

so what's the point of waking up then?

lol :P

sometimes

2012-01-24T01:59:00.000-08:00

yes, sometimes....

moolah

2012-01-23T19:37:00.000-08:00

another red packet from another neighbour, thank you! :)

the world of economic history

2012-01-23T17:34:00.000-08:00

" It was Britain's good fortune, as sovereign over large parts of India and in sole control of Bengal Opium production to be able to offset the trade deficit resulting from its chinese tea purchases against the trade surplus resulting from the Indian private trade.

In round figures, this set-off exercise resulted in an overall trade deficit against China accumulating at the average rate of 1.3 million a year (2 million surplus minus 0.7 million deficit), a sum equivalent to China's average annual exports of bullion to India"

and I thought I was done with econs in JC...

phewwww

2012-01-23T06:11:00.000-08:00

I thought that the 7,000 -10,000 words essay was due week 5. when it is actually due week 12.

Thank god!!

sinking in slowly

2012-01-22T23:57:00.000-08:00

reality starts sinking in....

anyway, craving for pineapple tarts right now. thanks to an evil (^^)V picture on facebook.

and macaroons! but bugis is seriously too far. and i have no business to be there. so let's just wait till i do.

we are in the same shoes

2012-01-22T05:09:00.000-08:00

it's amazing how we feel less afraid of our perceived "make a fool of ourselves" instances as semesters pass.

because at least based on my experiences of talking to so many people, we share the same concerns, anxieties, weaknesses. especially after we attended the same "methods to writing history" class. we ain't afraid to talk about our weaknesses and am more receptive to the opinions of others. we even let each other read our essays to critique em.

;)

with one of my fellow history mate, both of us share something in common, in that both our elder sisters are sociology majors while both of us are history majors.

and both of our sisters are high flyers; her sister was a valedictorian, best thesis award, first class honours while my sis is pursuing her masters in the best sociology school in US, university of chicago and she plans to pursue her PHD.

while both of us... let's just say.... we are at awe and proud of our sister's achievements and still struggling to offset the anxiety that comes with level 3000 modules. HAHAHAH ;) and we are in the shadow of our sister's success. :P

but honestly, without my sister, i wouldn't be in this path. she pushed me towards academic excellence for as long as I can remember.

:)

andai esok aku menjadi tanah

2012-01-21T15:55:00.000-08:00

sis posted this up on facebook and i went like, "lagu melayu? biar betul."

but this song is classic. should have included this song when i was compiling a song list for her wedding a year plus ago.

it's sunday anyway. feeling feeling wedding vibes in the air. LOL!

the horrowww

2012-01-21T05:49:00.000-08:00

my timetable looks so crazy with 5 mods.

yknow, profs know how many mods we take and stuff. one prof told us that there's one soul in the lecture who is taking 7 modules! 7 modules?

wowww

more than grades

2012-01-21T04:07:00.000-08:00

It's amazing how I have been religiously impacted by a module that I took on Mediterranean History two semesters ago.

Studying about the history of the Christians, Jews and Muslims made me read up more about the theology that influences their actions. And more than Abrahamic religions, I went on to discover for myself Buddhist and Hindu theologies. and started to learn about how religious theologies impacted the aesthetics - christian renaissance art, islamic calligraphy, buddhist mathura and gandhara art, hindu shiva art etc.

More than reinforcing my own beliefs (while not denouncing any other practices - to each their own), I became more receptive and tolerant about religious issues. You don't have to necessarily agree when you acknowledge a belief or practice. :)

and this semester, since I am taking another Mediterranean History module, it seems to me that the content so far is leading towards greater appreciation of religion, particularly the nuances within a religion (e.g. Christian East vs. West and Muslims Sufis, Sunni, Shia etc.) and i'm hoping that it will be another experience changing module as well.

and yes, may god always strengthen my iman with everything that he has planned for me

;)

good to know

2012-01-20T05:22:00.000-08:00

i feel like i've been incredibly whiny these past few days, but just today and yesterday, i've received three comments:

"i've never seen you stressed. you're always happy and smiling."

"I thought you look very relaxed"

"you look happy. it looks like you don't have worries"

good to know. good to know. haha ;)

because we are sisters like that

2012-01-19T16:54:00.000-08:00

sis: minus 12 degrees. macam dalam freezer

me: you know theres this song by omarion - ice box I think you can sing that song while you are feeling cold

sis: totalleh bebeh it's definitely an ice box. watching the you tube now. hahahah it's just him lancing ard

me: like sean paul samego salen?

sis: hahahah no he moves his feet not like samego salen Sean Paul hahahahahaha

*it's snowing in chicago right nowww

stranded with no keys

2012-01-19T05:47:00.000-08:00

yes, i am stranded outside the house with no keys at 10 pm. waiting for my parents to come home! apparently they did some shopping and stuff.

but thank goodness for the wireless connection that extends outside my house door.

anyway, my latest posts have been unbearably emotional -like stop it already. and i'm truly glad that the two things that have been keeping me on a all low mood has been solved. alhamdullilah.

it's so hard to be objective about things when you're overwhelmed by emotions. but yes. god please have mercy on me for the other obstacles that you have planned for me to face.

it has definitely been a flavourful start to the year (and its only the 19th of January) and i have learnt so many valuable lessons.

i have the tendency to delete my posts every now and then. cos opinions of the past don't really stay on to the present (haha the irony from a history major :P). and i just wanna start afresh with my thoughts.

today has been a great day! chatted with people who told me they appreciate my company (awww... thanks) and a catch up with a history mate that i've not spoken to (except for chat on FB) during the past holiday because she was out of singapore . so many stories to share, we spent hours in the canteen just chatting and chatting away. and i am so glad i've got to know so many other history majors after 3 semesters now. love their company!

and oh yes, received my first hongbao from my neighbour a few minutes ago (cos they will be away from Singapore for CNY). and boxes of oranges. thank you! my neighbour even offered for me to sit in their house while waiting for my parents. but of course i refused. don't wanna impose on them. i have good neighbours! grateful for that :)

ok chow for nowwww. ;)